I am born intersex, this is something I can’t change. I was born a chromosomal female, with full female reproduction capabilities. With that came the ability to think, act and have the interests of a woman in mind, heart and soul. The only thing that made me male or perceived as one was my ambiguous genitals, clothes and hair. Outside of that nothing of me was remotely male; which made me mimic other men/boys to stay passable as a male. It kind of worked but at the end of the day I was exhausted pretending. This led to depression and two attempts to take my own life.
I didn’t have Gender Dysphoria, I never cared what I looked like (male of female). I just know that since my exterior was male leaning, my mental side had to be seamless so nobody would catch on. Sometimes I slipped and was told to stop acting like a chic. Having to do the mental things men do such as likes, thought process, etc had to be intact or I was vulnerable. Testosterone helped my look by stopping my estrogen from making secondary female characteristics, but my brain was the issue.
Regardless if you are intersex or trans, a transition or correction may arise. When it does, we must understand that there is a mental and physical transition that must be processed to pass without exhaustion. Doctors don’t want to tell you, they say look the part and feel the part by being happy! True, but its deeper than that. In this video I go through and discuss this in detail and how it impacted my life and my push to stay male to my surrender which led to me becoming the woman I was born as.
